My ankles still hurt quite a bit when I run and my quads still aren't very strong. But I'm getting there slowly! Each time is a little easier. Okay, fine... I'll admit I found the treadmills that let you go negative incline... geez... cut me some slack! :-P These treadmills are crazy. They have fans and an iPad looking control device. Very high-tech for a very low-tech girl. Maybe treadmills have had nice fans for years. I guess I go to gyms that can only afford the cheap stuff. Those fans are pretty clutch. No wonder those treadmills are always crowded (hence why I haven't tried them)!
I have a confession to make. I think I am a hipster. I know. I'm scared too. I don't think mid-30's people can be hipsters. But I am really loving all of the Native American, Aztec and Tribal prints all over. But when I google to find cute stuff, the term hipster always seems to come up. I dunno. Is being a hipster a bad thing? I think hipsters are guys wearing skinny jeans, weird long shoes and t-shirts that are too fitted. Or girls with half their head shaved or dyed funky colors. Maybe I'm jealous. Maybe I want to be a hipster. I would never be brave enough to shave half my head. I just wanna wear all of the cool clothes :-) And buy these hideously awesome slippers from Target. They are so ugly that I love them. But I am having a hard time pulling the trigger and actually buying them.
Target has a special. Buy one get the second one 50% off. Who needs two pairs of this kind of slipper boot thing? Maybe it applies to all accessories. I need to check on that.
Things are going well. The annoying cough is still there. I called the Team today and am gonna see the doc on Tuesday. I don't know if the running I've done this week (twice) or the change of temps or my neighbor's blooming tree is contributing. My FEV1 is increasing, so I hope the cough is no big deal.
I noticed today that the feeling is back in the top of my foot! Thinking back, I think I regained feeling a few weeks ago. But when I was in the shower I noticed that the water pelting on it didn't bother it. My inner thigh on the other leg still has numbness (where the ECMO was). My veins aren't sclerosed anymore either. Nice and soft with no lumps or bumps. I still have discoloration from that horrible bruise on my arm.
I think the Bio-Oil is really working. My scars are lighter and "softer" looking. I did take a picture of one scar when I started so I'll take an "after" photo in a few months to see if it really does work. I think smearing any moisturizing stuff on scars will help, honestly. They sell Bio-Oil by the gallon at Costco. Okay, not really by the gallon, but you can buy industrial size. I have the normal size. I've been using it on a lot of scars for a few weeks and I have used maybe 1/4 oz? You can hardly tell any is missing. And I use it generously. Oooh... maybe I should buy the huge size and use it on my legs to see if I can get the Remodulin Rash to go away... hmmm...
And I started using Aquaphor moisturizing cream on my hands. Patty gave me some when she was here b/c my lips were super chapped. The other hand creams are good, and I still like them, but the Aquaphor lasts through a few more hand-washings. Mostly cuz it's almost pure petrolatum. Thank you Patty! :-) We go through 1 kitchen and 1 bath foamy handsoap every 2-3 weeks. I wash my hands A LOT. It's kind of ridiculous. You really don't wanna know how many paper towels we go through in a week. I try hard to recycle most of them.
The fear of rejection is always on my mind. Always. It's hard not to be paralyzed thinking about it. I have to live my life but I have to be afraid and cautious. I'm not complaining about it, just letting you know that I always think about it. So this cough makes me think about rejection even more. I am reminded that I am not "cured." I have only traded one thing for another thing. I don't really think I am in rejection. I do think my cough is from allergies. But that fear is always there.
Jeff is on his way home, so I'll sign off so we can do some dinner. I made vegetable soup last night with a bunch of stuff in the fridge and Jeff grilled some spice-rubbed okra. Actually wasn't too bad. Still kind of slimy though. I still have a LOT of okra left. Ugh. I might make gumbo.
Love you all! Have a great weekend.
No comments:
Post a Comment